The narcissist hasn't moved on. They may have discarded you. They may have found new supply. But they haven't really moved on. They can't move on. Because they have difficulty with emotional attachments. They can't attach to people in a normal way. But then they also don't know how to detach from people. They have difficulty with relationships and communication. They don't have deep and meaningful relationships. Which is why it's so easy for them to leave people and entertain multiple prospects. Because they can't attach. They can't experience a deep connection. It may look like they can. But they're just receiving narcissistic supply. It's a transaction. An exchange of compliments and praise. But there's no real connection. It's a shared fantasy. It's an illusion. Because they're not fully invested in anyone. They give them fragments of their attention. They flirt, but they're not really committed. Because they're not really interested in anything other than their own selfish desires and needs.
They don't care about other people. Because they're unable to fully attach to them. But even though they may have discarded you. And they're giving you the silent treatment. And you may think that they've moved on and forgotten about you. Because they don't know how to detach, they will always be watching you. They will always be checking in on what you're doing. Because they're going to hoover you. They're going to come back. But first they need to know that you're willing to accept them back. They need to know if they're going to be able to manipulate you again. Because they haven't taken accountability for their actions. They haven't worked on themselves. Because they don't care about building a relationship with you. They're just looking for supply. They're looking for attention and validation. They're looking for money or a place to stay. That's all they're looking for. They don't care about you. So they haven't changed. But they also haven't moved on. Which is why they're involved with so many people. Because they're still in contact with their exes. Just as they're still in contact with you. The narcissist never really moves on from anyone. They're still thinking about their past endeavours. They're still giving them attention. So even if they do come back, they're not going to be exclusive to you. They may reserve themselves for you in the beginning. But that won't last for long. It's only a matter of time until they get bored. And then they will be engaged with one of their exes again. Because they like to have a lot of people around them.
They need to have a backup option. Because they can't be alone. They need constant attention and validation. It's never enough for them. They always need more. Because when they were children, they never got what they wanted. They never got the attention and validation they craved from their parents or caregivers. They could never be themselves around them. They always had to be something else to get attention. To get the attention and validation that they craved. And they're still the same. They're still seeking what they never received in their childhood. And that is what motivates them. That is what fuels their behaviour. And when they don't get it, they get bored. They become depressed. And then they start to seek out other people to give them what they want. Because one person could never be enough for them. They always want more. Which is why they can't attach. It's why they could never be fully invested in you. It's why you could never have a deep connection and relationship with them. Because although they may have needed your attention, they could never reciprocate it back to you. You just ended up giving them more and more to compensate for their deficiencies. Which is exactly what they wanted. Because you thought you weren't good enough. That's what they made you believe. And then they discarded you and moved on to someone else. But they never really moved on.
They just found other people who were more susceptible to their manipulation. Other people who validated the illusions of their false self. While you were left with no closure. You were left to make sense of everything they did to you. You were left to try to figure out why they left. But they were never really gone. They were always watching you. To see if things were getting better for you. Because they know they're going to come back. They know they're going to need your supply.
They just need to know that you're going to be willing to give it to them again. They need to know that you're still going to love them. After everything they did to you. After everything they put you through. But they're never going to tell you this. Because they don't even know why they're doing it. They just know that they need your attention. But nothing is going to change. They're not going to take accountability for their actions. They're not going to make things better for you. They're just going to blame you.
This write-up on Narc behavior is spot on. My X acted exactly like she was reading this as a script. It is mind-boggling how they mirror each other’s actions and can be so predictable “AFTER” they’ve literally destroyed you. The only person in their miserable lives who truly loved them at one time. Until the Beast finally revealed it’s ugly head and intentions.