When you are around narcissists, life can be so difficult. They affect every aspect of your life. The longer you are around them, the more you will notice everything seems to fall apart. You start thinking, feeling, and behaving the way that they want. You change your personality and character, to make them feel more comfortable. You forget about the person you used to be before you met them. You stopped doing the things you once enjoyed doing, such as hobbies or interests, going to certain places, or talking to certain people. You don't do that stuff anymore, because the narcissist trained you to lower your vibration, to make them feel more comfortable, and to prevent any narcissistic injuries.
Being around narcissists, you are moving through life feeling intense negative emotions such as anger, desire, fear, grief, apathy, guilt, and shame. This is no fun. Being around narcissists you experience misery and suffering daily. This isn't how you are supposed to be living. Life is meant to be enjoyed, not endured. Life doesn't have to be so hard, it can be easy. It only seems so difficult because you are around difficult people. You are around people who believe that life is supposed to be difficult. I prefer to avoid these types of people, as I prefer to live a life which is fun, I prefer to live a life which is more enjoyable. Difficult people like narcissists will only hold you back and keep you down where they are at. And then they will blame you for that too. They claim that you are not good enough or something is wrong with you. Funny how you never dealt with any of this before you met them. Before you met these people, you were likely vibrating at quite a high level. This is what attracted them to you, they love high energy people. They do not have that, they also do not experience the high emotional vibrational frequencies, which you were probably experiencing daily before you met them. Emotional vibrational frequencies such as peace, joy, love, reason, acceptance, and willingness.
Narcissists are attracted to those frequencies initially, but these frequencies are not compatible with any narcissist. Narcissists are shamed based individuals. Shame is the lowest emotional vibrational frequency. This can never be compatible with any high emotional vibrational frequency. So by default, all they can do is bring you down. All they can do is cause you to feel intense low level frequencies such as anger, desire, fear, grief, apathy, guilt and shame. The narcissist will use manipulative tactics such as denial, projection, blame-shifting, and gaslighting to make you believe that those are your natural frequencies. They are not, it is the narcissist who brought you down to that level. But of course, they will not accept responsibility or accountability for anything that they do. They will deny any responsibility and instead project their insecurities, flaws, or imperfections on to you. They will shift the blame to you and they will gaslight you into believing that there is nothing wrong with you and you are crazy. So each day you feel all these intense negative emotions, low vibrational frequencies. You are likely struggling in your life, feeling completely dissatisfied and unfulfilled with your life. And worst of all, you have been made to believe that this is all your fault. This negative, low vibrational person is who you are. Or at least that's what they want you to believe. So you can continue living your life in this way, experiencing constant difficulties, isolation, and loneliness without ever questioning the narcissist as being the source of your problems.
Narcissists are boring, they are no fun. They do the same boring things every day. Never experiencing any real joy or happiness with anything that they do. They have all of these perceived limitations and they have put themselves in a box. Because of these perceived limitations, they feel that they need to limit you. They need to put you in a box, where you cannot talk to your friends any more, you cannot have a social circle. You cannot have hobbies or interests. In some cases they won't even let you have a job, they just expect you to stay home all day. All of this to prevent any possibilities of them having a narcissistic injury. But even with all of these precautions, you still experience daily arguments or disagreements with the narcissist. Every day is filled with hatred, anger, envy, and jealousy. It's like you can't do anything without setting them off. And over time, the narcissist has led you to believe that this is normal. The truth is it's not normal at all. Let me wake you up to the truth of these types of people. They are trying to enslave you, trying to put you into a box. Trying to prevent you from doing all of the things you would otherwise be doing, if you were not with them. Because any sense of happiness, satisfaction or fulfilment you experience in your life reflects on how miserable, dissatisfied, and unfulfilled they are in their lives. That's why they are always so hateful, angry, envious, and jealous of you. That's why they will constantly argue or disagree with you. Life can seem so hard when you are around these people.
Everything seems so difficult. Even the most basic, simplest things can be turned into something complex and confusing, when you are around them. And although they will say and do whatever they can to make you believe that this is normal. It's not normal at all. It's normal for them, in their world, where they feel compelled to have all of this abuse, manipulation and reality distortion to deny or manage any kind of reflection on their suppressed emotions, or whatever else they are trying to deny. Everything seems so complicated and complex around these people because of this. From childhood they have learned to suppress these intense negative emotions, they were not allowed to have them around their narcissistic parent. So they had to suppress them. They were taught by their narcissistic parent to prevent the action or expression of a feeling or idea. They were not allowed to express these actions or expressions of their feelings or ideas. They also never learned how to self reflect or look within themselves to deal with this. By default, their only other option is to project these actions or expressions on to you. They want you to express them or act them out. So it isn't long until your daily experience is to live in misery and suffering. Experiencing constant arguments and disagreements which are often completely meaningless and insignificant. Worst of all you are blamed for this and made to believe that this is just how life is supposed to be.
Let me wake you up to the truth survivors & thrives. Life is meant to be enjoyed, not endured. All of these arguments and disagreements most often have nothing to do with you and everything to do with the narcissist. They are not personal at all. The narcissist is acting on their dysfunctional thoughts, which then produce these intense negative emotions which they have to project onto you. Just think about this for a moment. If we had a conversation together, you and me. And we had a disagreement. It would not go on for long periods of time, it would be resolved within seconds and we would reach a mutual understanding or a
resolution. It would also not be brought up again the next day, or the day after that. There would be no grudges or resentment. You cannot do this with the narcissist. How can you have a mutual understanding or a resolution with a person who has an inner dialogue or inner critic which is programmed to block or deny any form of mutual understanding or resolution? And believe me, there is nothing normal about this. If we were talking and we had a disagreement about something, it would be over in seconds. It would not go on for days, weeks, months, or years like with the narcissist. You will not agree with someone all of the time.
Disagreements are a natural part of a relationship, but that does not mean they have to turn into arguments. We can compromise, we can learn to be in the same proximity of understanding. As emotionally mature adults, we naturally have good conflict resolution skills. So a disagreement will never turn into grudges or resentment that last a lifetime. All of these intense negative emotions you have to deal with from them. All of the arguments and disagreements. You can't go out anywhere, you can't talk to anyone or do anything. And you have been taught to believe that this is normal, this is how your life is supposed to be. Every aspect of your life, every aspect of your character and personality has been changed or adjusted to make the narcissist feel more comfortable. And now you are not even living, you are not even being you. So it should be no surprise that life is miserable when you are around these people. You can't even be yourself, you can't even live the life that you want to live. And there is nothing normal about this. You have been trained to live within the bounds of the perceived limitations which the narcissist has created in their own minds and
then applied to you and your life, to prevent the sense of injustice or unfairness they would otherwise feel. This is how life will be, when you are around self hating, insecure and emotionally unhealthy people. But there is nothing normal about this. If we were in a relationship together, your life would not be this way. You would not be stuck at home every day. You would not be afraid to go out and develop social circles or have hobbies and interests. You would not feel as though you are doing something wrong, when you talk to certain people or go to certain places. Whether we are going together, or if you choose to go on your own or with your friends. In a healthy relationship, none of that would be an issue. There would be no envy or jealousy, because in a healthy relationship there is a mutual understanding that we have our own separate
lives.
There is no need to control every aspect of your life or set perceived limitations. You can move through your life freely without constant fear, stress, or anxiety. Life is so much easier without narcissists. Everything comes together naturally. There are no constant or repeating arguments or disagreements. None that can't be resolved within a few seconds. But you don't get that with the narcissist. Everything is a problem, everything has to be controlled. Your daily living experience has to be limited or restricted in some way. And it's no fun, it's not living. You are basically on autopilot living the way that the narcissist wants you to live. Not having a life of your own, not having a mind of your own. And that is why you feel so drained and lifeless, as though there is no happiness or joy in your life. Leave the narcissist will all of the arguments, disagreement, grudges and resentment which they have held on to. Leave them with all of the negative energy. It clearly resonates more with them, than it does with you. Once you leave the narcissist, you will discover how much easier life can be. Everything that was once limited or restricted in your life, will soon develop on its own. You will find social circles, have healthy relationships, good careers, hobbies, and interests. All of this is so easy to achieve and obtain without these people in your life. It's only difficult because you have a narcissist in your life, controlling everything you do. Their life is difficult because they lack the capabilities or motivation to create what they want. They have limited or restricted beliefs. Because of this, they feel as though they have to limit or restrict you in some way. But once you leave these people, you will find that life is so much easier. You will realize that you had the capabilities and motivation all along. It's just they were holding you back, they were preventing you from being your best self, because it hurt them. They didn't want you to know that, so they made you believe that something was wrong with you, or you were not good enough. That was not true.
You are good enough, you are more than enough, more than they will ever be. And they knew this all along, which is why they felt so compelled to limit or restrict you. Prevent you from being your true self, prevent you from living the life that you wanted to live. But once you finally decide to leave the narcissist you will realise that life is so much easier without them.
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